Funky Mood

I'm in a bit of a funk today. I don't usually use my blog for real journaling, but after a long walk on the beach and sorting through all these thoughts racing through my mind, I figured why not. Our departure date is nearing. I realized during my walk that I'm feeling conflicted about it which explains in part my funk. I'm so excited to go home. I miss my family, my friends, my home. I miss jumping into the car and driving to what now seems like a plethora of fun kid friendly options of ways to spend an afternoon. But, home as I know it will be different with this experience. I like change, but always with moments of thinking ahead to what it will be like and how we'll adjust.

This morning I woke up feeling trapped. I know, I know, who wants to listen to me who gets to sit by the beach complain about feeling bored and antsy. For the most part, when I have these moments of feeling isolated, I quickly remind myself of what an amazing opportunity this is, how fortunate I am to get this time and get over it and move on. But today, I just couldn't shake it.

I think as I get closer to returning home, I almost feel more homesick and more frustrated with the parts of life here that have been challenging. During my walk, I felt so joyous when a woman and I exchanged a smile and bonjour when passing eachother. Usually, when I walk by myself I look around every now and then to make sure noone's following me. The beach here is fairly isolated and even in the states we need to take precautions, but I feel like there are more eyes on me here. As much as Seattle gets a negative rap for being superficially friendly, I miss the smiles and hellos with strangers. In Morocco, I learn to look straight ahead and not make eye contact while at the same time continuing to be amazed at how people have no qualms about staring and following you with their eyes. For the most part, I haven't felt too bothered, but lately these little things have been weighing me down more than usual.

While I have these frustrations, as I mentioned above, I also feel so lucky to be spending this time with my family. Part of the lesson for me here is enjoying moments as I live them rather than thinking to the past or jumping to the future. Time moves so quickly, and as cliched as it sounds, you never know what the future holds making it all the more important to take advantage of the present. Also, because this voyage has been full of ups and downs, especially with a strong-willed toddler in tow, I've learned the importance of taking things lightly. Sometimes I become so wrapped up in my little world here and appreciate the time I've had to actually stop, think, process and then time moves on.

Ahh, I do feel better now getting these thoughts off my chest. Writing has always helped and it's a curious thing to know there's folks reading my words.

On another note, Younis had his second haircut, this one thanks to Imad. I was a little skeptical at first of how it would turn out but was thoroughly impressed with the end result.

Sefrou

Earlier this week, we took a little trip to Sefrou, the hometown of Imad's father located right outside of Fez. Sefrou is a beautiful town, not a village, but definitely a smaller city with a much more traditional Moroccan feel. The last time Imad visited Sefrou was believe it or not with me over 10 years ago. So the family all reminisced about the places we'd visited that many years ago. We again went to the famous waterfall of Sefrou and the look out point where you see the rolling hills and beautiful landscape surrounding the city.

Younis' favorite activity these days is "throw the rock in wa wa" as he says translated as throwing rocks in water. Usually shortly after waking up which is often painfully early at the crack of dawn, Younis is ready to run down to the beach and start throwing rocks, shells and wet sand in the ocean. When we got to the waterfall in Sefrou, Younis was overjoyed when Imad's cousin took off his shoes and put him in the water surrounded by a million rocks. It was a challenge tearing him away from all those rocks when we had to leave. When we got back to the house, Younis got nice and dirty discovering the joys of throwing gravel in the street... Yay!

Imad's cousins live in a traditional Moroccan house in this alley. From the outside, it looks unadorned and plain, but when you go inside the doors, there are traditional ceramic mosaic tiles on the walls and beautiful Moroccan couches. Younis spent most of the day kicking the ball and running around the alley with his cousins. One of the things I love about Morocco is how people let their kids play and run free without worrying because the older kids learn at a young age to look out for the little ones. Of course, I was worried and kept checking on Younis and everyone kept telling me don't worry. Even the adults hanging out on the street keep an eye out for the kids. The communal culture here is such a beautiful value that I will truly miss.

Younis learned some great "futbol" moves from his talented 3 year old cousin. This kid knows how to kick a ball. Younis and his cousin got along great and had so much fun playing. Younis also fell in love with his older 6 and 8 year old cousins and the neighbor girls who showered him with attention.

As is custom, we ate extremely well. Imad's cousin Layla made delicious Harira, Moroccan soup that those of you who came to the restaurant probably tasted. Most of the family only spoke Arabic and limited French so it forced me to practice my Arabic. The kids especially would talk and talk to me to see what I understood. They kept asking me to say things in Arabic and whether I understood this or that, I think it was an amusing game at my expense! It was hilarious though after eating the harira, Layla asked me how I would rate it. I said it was delicious and gave it a 10 out of 10. I said it half in Arabic and half in French so another cousin translated. Layla's reaction was one of surprise that I only gave it a 10 and didn't like it more! Her cousin said but no, 10 out of 10 is the most, it could be 100 out of 100 or a million out of a million and it would be the same thing. Everyone was laughing. I think no matter what, I would never have been able to rate it high enough.

The next day, we left in the morning and met Imad's father and brother in law at Moulay Yacoub to enjoy the natural healing waters. There was a daycare on site which was great so Younis hung out there and played while we went to the pool. I had been here many years ago before they built the fancier center. The first time I went it was a big pool with men and women separate more like a hammam experience. In this newer spot, there's a mixed pool and a women's pool. The women's only pool is small and not as nice so we all went to the bigger mixed pool. The waters were wonderful, nice and hot and smelling of sulfur. The downside was that it was majority men and it felt like all the eyes followed my every step, despite the fact that I was there with my husband. It might have just been at that moment because as we were leaving a huge group of French tourists arrived which would have created a different ambiance. It's just hard to relax when you're feeling watched so I think I'll head back to the women's hammam soon for what I know will be 100% relaxation.

Eleben and Elephants

It's pretty adorable watching Younis learn his ABC's and 123's. We're pretty impressed with his singing skills so far. We go to a weekly singing group called Rabat Tunes and while not a huge fan at first (he preferred playing with the cars), he now always looks forward to singing and often asks about Rabat Tunes each time we get in the car. We have this mini chalkboard and the other day Imad had his mind set on hearing Younis count from 1-11. I'm not sure why we go to 11 and not stop at 10, but in the end it's a great thing because Younis LOVES the number 11. He gets so excited and will start counting and usually by about 6 or 7 screams "ELEBEN" with the b. Here they are working hard. He can almost get through singing the alphabet, but also tends to jump ahead cause he can't wait for the WXY and Z.

It's hard to believe, but we actually leave for the states in only 5 weeks. Time is starting to fly by and I feel a mix of excitement and anticipation to see my family and friends and be back in my home while also leaving the lovely life we've created here. I know this is only more intense for Imad being from here and being so close to his family. We are so lucky to have had this experience, so no complaints, but it will be a rough transition back to our life in Seattle as much as I look forward to it at the same time.

Yesterday, we ventured back to the zoo. I still can't get over how close you can get to the animals, the gates are minimal. Look how close we are to the elephant and lion, and this is not a zoom lens trick. While this is incredible to see the animals so close up, it's also slightly frightening at times. The elephant really looked like he/she was about to jump across the little mote thing separating us and crush the gate to get to the sunflower seeds we were snacking on and that leads to my troubles with the zoo. You can eat anywhere and these animals are so used to being fed. When we got to the elephants, one of the poor guys was stuffing an empty chips bag into its mouth and successfully ate it. That's sad to watch. Probably unfair of us to tempt the elephant with the sunflower seeds to, but even if we weren't eating, I think they watch us as much as we watch them to see if we have any treats to throw across the gate.

We're still very much enjoying our time on the beach. It's so beautiful here and I'm getting accustomed to falling asleep to the sound of ocean waves and finding sand in every piece of clothing and in Younis' hair and diapers everyday. I will miss Morocco.

Family Time

Younis got to hang out with a bunch of his cousins this weekend. He had a blast running around in the sand, water and playing with his mostly older cousins. All things considered, limited fights and battles to break up. Here he is with the group during a down moment coloring pictures.

La Carnaval chez Taimount

Today Younis participated with his class, la toute petite section de la pre-maternelle a l'Ecole Taimount, in the school wide carnival parade. The school goes from pre-k (starting with 2 year olds) through elementary school. Each class had a different theme and had amazing costumes made, really high quality. The street in front of the school was closed off so each class had a turn to go out on the street and show off their costume, do a little routine and march down the street.

Younis' class was full of teletubbies. I am so unfamiliar with that cartoon as of yet, but these kids looked pretty adorable despite the fact that their costumes looked somewhat like snowsuits and it was probably in the high 70's by mid-morning. They were hot teletubbies. I was asked by the director of the school to help as a parent volunteer in Younis' class. My first official parent school volunteer duties!! There must have been about 15 or so kids in his class. At any one time at least a third were crying or having some sort of tantrum, but somehow we managed to get them all out on to the street to parade their costumes and show off their moves. I love the look of overwhelmed, confused 2 year olds trying to make sense of their surroundings. It was adorable.

And what would a carnival parade be without High School Musical. Here they are showing off their moves. I think this is probably the oldest class, one of the U.S.' great exports.

After we paraded, we went back into the school and had to change all the kids back to normal clothes. Once we finally got back out, Younis was so excited by all the music and dancing, he couldn't resist joining in on some of the older kids' performances, here he is imitating the Bollywood dancers.

Bouznika

Yesterday we ventured south to another beach about a 15 minute drive away in the town of Bouznika. It's another beautiful beach, a little more high class it seemed with fancier houses, a golf course in a private community. We spent the morning discovering the joys of what it feels like to have our feet sink into wet sand and getting soaked running away from the ocean waves.

I love people watching at the beach. Especially at our beach in Skhirate you see all the fishermen, groups of men playing soccer, young boys doing their jumping tricks and flips, families with young children, surfers and boogie boarders, people exercising, tanning, building sand castles, girls and young women in bikinis then women wearing djellabas (the traditional Moroccan full-length loose fitting dress with a hood that both men and women wear over their clothes) some with hijab others not.

There is such misunderstanding and misconception in the US about Islam. Like all religions I know of, there are so many interpretations of Islam and what it means to be Muslim. What is so fascinating about Morocco is that there is space for a diversity of interpretations that coexist. The US mainstream media does such a poor job of presenting a realistic view of the diversity within the Muslim world. When I first lived in Morocco, people loved Clinton and there was a real positive view of America. It changed after 2001, Bush and wars in the Muslim world. People here in general seem to support Obama, but there is still mistrust, especially around Iraq, Afghanistan and the Israeli/Palestinian conflict. Morocco has always been an ally to the US, but it will be interesting to see more on the ground level how people feel about Americans over the coming years.

Younis is getting close to singing the entire alphabet. We were practicing writing the alphabet in the sand and jumping on each letter while we sang the song. I especially love how he sings LMNOP. He used to be obsessed with the letter X but has now moved on to the letter W as his number one favorite letter.

We brought some sand up to our patio so he could have a little sandbox, just in case he got tired of all the massive amounts of sand on the beach:)

Rock Climbing

This morning Imad and I went for a nice long walk on the beach. At low tide, you can climb on the rocks pretty far out to the edge where lots of fishermen go in the morning. The rocks are covered with sea creatures, especially tons of mussels. They are everywhere and on the main road heading out of Skhirate, people sell boiled mussels ready to eat from the side of the road. I consider myself an adventurous eater, but don't think I'll be eating the boiled mussels anytime soon.

The ocean rocks look to me like moon craters. They are sharp and a challenge to maneuver around. We were wearing our running shoes, bad choice, and eventually just gave in and waded with our shoes on through the water to get to the edge.